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Wednesday, January 21, 2009

You slid WHAT?

One thing I know every driver sees is some 4x4 going like a bat out of hell across black ice and down the road. And I know what we all say about it:


The best part for me, especially in SE Michigan, was coming back home the same way and seeing the dumbass in the ditch shrieking into a cell phone.

It's physics, folks--no matter how much stop you are able to put on a forward force, there is a certain length of time and length of space that it will take for that vehicle to stop. In short, whether you have 2 wheel drive or 4, you still only have 4 brakes and it will take a bit to halt your dumb ass.

It would be interesting to know how many of those ditch-dwellers find themselves holding tickets for Driving Too Fast for Conditions--and wondering why someone with a 4x4 shouldn't drive the speed limit when there's black ice, sleet and some dipshit picking his nose in the car ahead of you. So you hit the gas, intending to go around and come out on the other side...

...and find minivans full of little kids pointing at you and laughing.

4 wheel drive benefits your traversal thru areas that are less accessible for a 2 wheel drive car. They don't mean you can stop on a dime and never wind up in a ditch.

All it means is there's a ghost of a chance you can drive out of the ditch just like you drove into it.

Get that imprinted into the tofu you substitute for brains and quit trying to run my family members off the road. You spill my Egg Drop Soup again and you and I will dance with knives, capishe?

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